This year, I’ve finally stepped into the shoes that have been waiting for me and began to walk in them… after a long, internal struggle of having to come to terms with what started out as what I affectionately call my “Grand Awakening” in 2009. I’ve come to fully accept this, allow it, and I’m finally able to embrace myself and what I understand I came here to do. Once I realized how much it would ultimately make my heart and soul sing, I was able to stop caring about what others thought about me and about this choice, which on the surface might seem like a complete about face in my direction, and in my life.
The most interesting part in doing this has been observing the reaction of others in my life – whether the relationship was short or long term, casual or intimate – and how or whether they’ve accepted it!
Of course I’ve had some relationships fall away… I’ve had some prominent characters disappear out of my life, and others dissipate more slowly. But once I released my own fears and demons and chose to stand firm in self love, respect, and confidence, I found that many relationships mainly just shifted, along with me. The others? Well, for the time being, I understand that the relationship didn’t serve us both, and so it wasn’t necessary any more. But there are still others with whom I know do or will serve me and them in the future… even though they haven’t been in my day-to-day life for awhile. Having that understanding is truly the coolest part!
Losing the camaraderie of loved ones is also typically one of the greatest fears of many of my clients and students, who are tapping into themselves, allowing and embracing not just their empowerment but also tapping into this world of what I call the “expanded Universe”…which often means deviating from traditional belief systems that might be accepted by their family and/or friends. Mostly, the initial fear is one of “going against the flow” and being ridiculed, judged, outcast… and unloved. I understand this, and understand the root of this. Been there, done that!
However, I stand strong by a statement I heard earlier this year and seem to reiterate over and over and over: “It’s none of your business what others think of you.” What I’ve added on is also “…because what they think of you has solely to do with THEIR issues.” And that’s Truth. But because of how we operate, how we’ve evolved in a culture of having others’ opinions of us often matter more than our own – and/or allowing others telling us what’s best for us – that it’s sometimes challenging to overcome.
So, when I first “came out of the closet,” leaping fully into the spiritual and metaphysical world, I’m sure it was quite equivalent to the process of “coming out of the closet” in the commonly understood context! However, instead of the “hot topic” being my gender/sexual preference, it was instead my spirituality, “hoo-doo-voo-doo,” and “woo-woo” practices… which can easily be just as sensitive a topic, ESPECIALLY since many with whom I’ve been close over the long term have been a) very analytical and black and white, and/or b) very set in one path of traditional religious practice, typically passed down by their family.
Instead of worrying about it, I decided to simply be me.
What was pretty amusing was how those who were a little uncomfortable talking about spirituality and my latent uncovered abilities were oh-so-very-cautious in the beginning! The best would be when someone I hadn’t seen for awhile started drilling me about what I was doing… I could just tell the first questions they would silently ponder, as they shifted a little uncomfortably:
- “Can she read my mind?” FYI, yes, I technically can – we ALL can, with a little practice – but really have no interest in doing so and generally choose to block it out and not focus on THAT right now, until our telepathic abilities ALL open up; but more on that later…
- “Does she really communicate with other Beings, or has she simply lost her mind?” Hmm, went through THAT question myself, back in 2009; and if I have lost my mind, well, I’m happy and (mostly) harmless, so what does it matter? 😉
- “Is she going to start preaching or pushing her beliefs on me now?” Absolutely not; everyone’s path is their own, and what works for me and what works for you, though possibly very different, is both right, if it’s right for us individually
- “Is she going to be all serious and pious and distant all the time now?” Another negative here! I teach others to get in touch with their Higher Selves, how to get on the path that is highest and best for them… and I LOVE to teach the fun, adventure, and excitement that can come along with that! In fact, I’m probably more laid back, adventurous, and humorous than I’ve EVER been before… because it’s ALL awesome! 🙂
- “What hoo-doo-voo-doo is she into?” All I practice is based in Oneness, love, and healing; connectedness and the natural Divine abilities we all have… so, no sacrificial virgin, first born, or household pet blood offerings… and no, I don’t dance naked in the woods… not that there’s anything wrong with that… and hmmm… maybe not so bad on a warm summer’s night… LOL
- “Has she really changed a lot? What will we talk about?” Well, DUH… I’m STILL ME!
After awhile, I guess they realized just that: I’m still me… only better.
I’m far happier, more at peace, and can do some really, really neat, fun, and amazing stuff… every day’s being on the playground to me these days! I’m even more inclined to try new things (HAH… and you thought I was adventurous BEFORE? LOL), and do something completely foreign on a whim (ditto the previous statement)… However, if that neat, fun, and amazing stuff isn’t your cup of tea… that’s fine. I don’t bring anything up that I do during the “workday” unless a) I know that you’re comfortable with it, and b) you ask me to or bring it up yourself.
Not that I’m hiding my spirituality or who I am, but that’s the point: it’s simply assimilated with who I am, and there are so many things to talk about that don’t include needing to focus on that one particular part of me… 🙂
The message here is for anyone and everyone who is actively exploring a “new” spiritual path, one that is unique to them (as it should be), and not necessarily “in line” with what was “expected” of them in the past: Stand in your Truth, and follow your heart – yours and yours alone – because anyone who loves you will only be happy for you if you are truly coming from a place of love and happiness within yourself; and if they have an issue with it, it truly is THEIR issue… not yours! If a relationship falls away because of it… it didn’t serve you in the highest and best way to begin with; OR, sometimes there just needs some readjustment time… and/or the relationship will resume at a later date, when it does serve the both of you in that way.
In fact, doing this one simple thing can set you up as an example for others around you. Just think, when we all just doing that, how different this world will become!
5 Comments
m thomas · October 16, 2011 at 12:14 pm
yes, true, once you get to a certain place on your spiritual path, you will find many friends in your ‘old life’ will fall away, this is because they are not capable of supporting you anymore–this is natural and part of the process. And that’s ok. what is important now is to surround yourself with spiritual people who will support you. only now you will find yourself being more discerning in who you choose to be your close friend(s), friends in passing through, and/or just acquaintances as you walk your spiritual path. just trust your heart–it is the only tool for spiritual discernment. why? because your ego-i will always get it wrong because your ego-i will always steer you away from the Absolute truth because your ego-i does not want to give up control ever and will fight you every second of every day to keep you from surrendering completely and becoming God-Realizied.
RoadtoAwakening · October 16, 2011 at 3:16 pm
Well, as your vibration changes, you will simply attract more of like vibration; with so many changing, as well, as I said, many relationships actually change or shift. I have some friendships now that I wouldn’t have guessed would have transcended the shift I have made… but the nature of them simply shifted, too… all for the better.
I actually find that I’m far MORE open to those with whom I’m friends… because again, vibration attracts vibration, and I simply have more in my life who are on the “same wavelength” as me than ever before. It’s blissful!
I would actually say that the more in love and Oneness we are, the MORE open we are to MORE people… because in essence, EVERYONE is a version of me… so why wouldn’t I love me? The goal is to have full, whole-hearted love for EVERYONE. I trust that all I encounter is for my highest, best, and most positive experience… and so it is. 🙂
Roniklass · October 16, 2011 at 7:42 pm
Thanks for the post!
I was going to write, “Angela, I always knew you were gay!” but decided against it, except you can see I actually wrote that. Never mind. Just a joke!
I have a friend who took the Loving Relationships course, and she lent me her notes. One read: “Relationships never end; they just change form.” So for the relationships you thought would end, they just changed form.
As for oneness and love, I took a course in which the founder used to say, “Underneath everything, even anger and disagreement, if you keep chipping away, there is always love.” It may take a while to get there, but that was one of his founding truths of the universe.
Peace my friend.
RoadtoAwakening · October 16, 2011 at 9:19 pm
LOL Roni! 🙂
My understanding is that the only absolute in this universe is Love; all else is pretend… so I completely agree with your statement. In the end, we are all One, and if all is Love, OF COURSE under it all, that’s all there is! So simple… yet we’ve made it so complex here on the 3D Earth plane in the name of experiencing and ego!
Many worry about this… almost to an excessive degree. They worry about their relationships failing if they deviate from the “norm” of accepted beliefs and practices… I’ve been seeing this more and more, as many more are awakening. It’s one of the first steps to surrender, of letting go… In fact, I know just by association that there are multiple relationships in my life where I know my comfort in my spirituality and metaphysics has actually expanded THEIR horizons, just watching and paying attention to what I’m talking about… even if we never really discuss it openly. To me, that’s GREAT – because it tells others that it’s OK to do that, to explore outside the boundaries of “the boxes” (your favorite term LOL) themselves!
Angel · October 18, 2011 at 3:56 pm
Go, Angela, Go!!! It is scarey to step out, but what an inspiration you are now to countless others. I am so proud of you and so appreciative of being connected to such a power as you. We’ll be crazy together, okay? I’d rather be crazy with this than otherwise sane. WHOO HOO!!! Go, Angela, Go!!