These past few weeks have had the energy of support to finally… get… to… the… thorn that’s been in our side (even if we were “ignoring” it until now). Many things are/have been coming to a head for many, and depending on our choices (graceful and easy, or not?), it IS finally erupting so that we can LET IT GO.
Myself included; there have been some things “in my face” and a part of my experience for so long (throughout most of this life, and I understand many others, as well) that I can’t believe it took so long to SEE it, and then finally release it… TOTAL “DUH moments”! And then, once the main one was released… WOW… other “big things” just started coming up and flowing, flowing, flowing out. The result: It’s been HUGELY productive and cleansing! It’s been such a huge release and shift that I found I temporarily felt a huge, empty hole in place of those energies, because they’ve been a part of me for so long (even though they didn’t serve me, except to learn the lesson). I focused my efforts on releasing the feeling of the hole, and now, in its place has grown blessed peace, love, and AHHHHHH….
During this period, I’ve seen SO MANY symptoms of this, within myself, with clients, students, friends, family… and also institutions, belief systems, collective consciousness, you name it! The result is that for many, it feels like the world (the personal world, the world itself) is crashing down around them. Paradigms are shifting… so much is falling away in more ways than could previously be imagined!
What’s important to realize is that when our world feels that way, the lynchpin is actually our Self. Sometimes it’s most challenging for us to see in ourselves the deepest pieces of what may be holding us back… because the ego says, “Unh-unh… this is WHO WE ARE… who would we be if we let this go?” And so… the ego takes on the job of BUILDING the identity around it, and it creates a zillion excuses to SAFEGUARD it. It becomes very adept at hiding this as a limitation, and when a situation comes up that you KNOW limits you in some way, the ego justifies it (often like a martyr), and says, “Oh, that’s just who I am…” and similar ideas. It will vehemently maintain the BEing in the limiting state, because it’s afraid of becoming nothing otherwise. And… sometimes we allow the ego to sabotage us by keeping us JUST SHORT of reaching our goal… because reaching the goal is actually the biggest fear. There will be a LOT of “almost” situations, to keep us going (and, of course, the identity can stay in the mode of “working toward the goal,” which feels far safer).
I see this in very 3D ways… and I see this in very spiritual ways. I’ve seen some very adept and advanced healers/metaphysicians suddenly have a crash of sorts – physical, emotional, spiritual, and/or environmental – which feels like it came out of nowhere… and suddenly, all of their practices stop working in the fashion they’d worked before; they experience one major blockage after another… and it seems that the more they try things to remedy the situation and keep moving – regardless of what it is – the worse things seem to get. Nothing makes sense in terms of the results of their efforts… and it keeps on holding them back until they retreat from their previous efforts and sometimes give up for a bit (retreats), or find a strategic way to get BACK to the “comfort zone” (which sometimes seems different, but it’s simply the same thing disguised differently). This is from the ego sensing major danger (“Danger, danger, Will Robinson!”) because the person was actually getting REALLY CLOSE to the point of releasing a MAJOR limitation that’s been holding them back, something they’ve had well ingrained and incorporated into their identity… and the ego pulls out all the stops to hang on to the old identity for dear life (since my understanding is that it’s the ego’s primary job to create an identity separate from “the whole”).
When that happens… I’m telling you now: Know that YOU’RE ALMOST THERE. Know that obviously, there’s something in the vicinity of where you were when everything came crashing down that REALLY posed the release of this. That’s key!
So, we’re at the point in this Shift when it’s SO important that when we get to the “edge of the cliff” – even if we can’t see what’s beyond – that instead of staying at the edge indefinitely (or turning back), we TRUST and take a leap. We’ve come this far… might as well go all the way!
I know, I know, I make it sound so easy, right? I know it takes a lot of continuous effort; however, right now, this energy is so pervasive that the Higher Self isn’t giving us a whole lot of leeway… either we look at it ourselves or we manifest situations that will become so confining in some way, shape, or form that we finally have no choice but to be completely paralyzed, check out, or bust out of it, once and for all!
WOW… I promise you, the feeling of such deeply ingrained energies/limitations is EXHILARATING!
And then… the next part is really, really important to navigate in a very conscious way; after the release of such ingrained energies (habits and identity), the next typical reaction is a feeling of being lost, feeling sad, lonely… sort of like being in a void.
We don’t talk about this point beyond huge clearings much… but many don’t know how to get beyond that point; they don’t even know the words to describe what they feel. We think, WOW… I’m so glad I got rid of that/attained that/healed that… and then the ego scrambles and freaks out, saying, “NOW WHAT? WHO ARE WE NOW? WHAT DO WE DO?” If one doesn’t know what to do to move forward, sometimes they will slip backwards again and they will find a way to exhibit a different behavior that creates the same energy as what they just released… because that’s the “comfort zone” of the ego (it’s a “known evil,” and therefore, comfortable).
It’s SO perfect (of course) that these energies abound while the Winter Olympics in our 3D reality… because think about it: Many singularly train for the Olympics; for many, it’s been their entire life until now. So, say you win the gold medal, which was your ultimate goal, and you’re done with the Olympics now… what do you do next? Now what? Many go through a period of this “hole,” once the fanfare dies down… not knowing who they are anymore and where “to go” next. (And, by the way, that’s the period through which many fall into undesirable habits and “get into trouble”… because they don’t know how to “fill the hole” and simply find other ways to get the adrenaline of attainment going again.)
So…as we continue releasing such BIG stuff… there will be temporary periods of feeling a void… feeling lost… feeling like, “Good grief… this feels worse than I did before…” Sometimes, this provides feelings of isolation, loneliness, sadness (and tears), and/or fears of failure (because of releasing those energies in your life – which often sever relationships or situations that would perpetuate that “old energy”). This often exists in the gap of releasing those energies/behaviors from the identity and then expanding into our pure, undiluted, Divine self in that “space.”
First of all, recognize that this feeling of “the void” is simply the belief that you’ve lost an important part of you; and instead know that you’ve actually released a limiting part of you that will allow you to take another leap toward the full, Divine you and ultimate purpose that you came here to attain!
Well, there is meditation, of clearing the mind, focusing on the heart and the Divine light that you shine, and simply expand it out, out, out… (I have some basic guided meditations to do this available here on this Website). In doing so, you can set the intention/affirmation of releasing the “old identity,” and if you like, get conscious understanding of how this serves you in the highest and best way. If you’re a spiritual practitioner, focus your healing intentions on releasing the beliefs that you’re “less than” because of what you’re released, in any way, shape, or form. Whenever you’re feeling the heaviness, focus on expanding the light from your heart, brighter and brighter (and remember that the rest is all illusion).
If you feel like you need outside assistance in getting through this, you can talk to a practitioner of your choosing (I’d be glad to work with you... and there are many, many other spiritual mentors/advisors/healing facilitators available today who can help you – go by your inner guidance as to who will be best for you and your situation!). Do you have a spiritual discussion peer group, a place where you can talk about these feelings and the processing without judgment? This is a great forum to talk about it, and share your processing if you feel like you need outside support (for in person… if you’re in the central NC area, I moderate an open spiritual discussion group in three different Triangle locations monthly; see the Meetup; I’ve also built an interactive online spiritual community on Facebook; you can join here). Find a new hobby, do a hobby you enjoy more… remember how to ENJOY to space you’ve created, simply stay in the moment, and know/trust that now you’ve left space for something phenomenal to come in, in a way that DOES serve you in the highest and best way!
Right here, right now… if you would like a clearing that will provide assistance to allow you to resolve, dissolve, release, and clear the core underlying issues that would cause the feeling of a “void” after releasing prominent limitations in your life, remove the energy of that feeling of that void, and know how to allow your Self to positively and productively fill in the space left by the clearing in the highest and best way with the most grace and ease, just close your eyes, be open to receive, and say, “Yes – filling the void.”
Once we get through this… just know, we ALL get the gold!
5 Comments
Nara Hari · February 21, 2014 at 9:36 am
hey thanks for those words. i feel like i have been on the edge for awhile, and i just cant dont want to let go for fear of the unknown. And thusly have felt prety stuck . but this wek i have def felt a lightening of intensity or just more strength and trust.
Bonnie Butler · February 21, 2014 at 12:56 pm
This is just what we talked about the other day. I’m not sure what I released but I sure felt the feelings of loss, emptiness, isolation, sadness etc. etc. etc.as I told you during the conversation. I know that I had started putting the walls back up for protection. I think I have stopped or slowed that progress, but it is still very painful at times. So many things happening at once, leaves one feeling overwhelmed. Thanks for your time.
RoadtoAwakening · February 21, 2014 at 8:33 pm
Bonnie… I think it started when you took class last month… and you’ve been releasing BIG STUFF (what you moved to NC to do) ever since! I didn’t see it clearly until this morning; I was actually starting to write this commentary for Facebook, and got loud and clear, NOPE… it’s a BLOG… many will benefit. And it all came together… you and quite a few others I’ve spoken/worked with this week ALL had the same “symptoms”… another DUH moment (thanks for being a part)! LOL!
sandy weinzweig · February 21, 2014 at 8:14 pm
Exactly what I needed to hear.. felt the void.. and started heading back to things and people that kept me stuck… thank you…so clear now…its a jump… a big one.. but the only one!
Jeneva Snow · February 22, 2014 at 9:14 am
My apologies Angela, I just saw the About Me tab and am now aware of your bio. You were very helpful to me today as I read this. I was able to release a huge block as I moved through the passages.