The other day, a friend of mine asked me, “How is the world for you now, since you’ve discovered all of these Awakened abilities and done all of this work over the past year?”
My first thought: Huh? YEAR? Hasn’t it been DECADES? LOLLOL
However, here was my answer: “It’s a completely different world – so much more beautiful and poetic, so MUCH MORE, period! But here are times when I just feel like there’s just SO MUCH for us to do, and on the fly, as things speed up faster and faster!”
At the onset of learning and fine-tuning energy and spiritual work on myself and others, I really thought that the more I learned, the more in control of the bigger picture I would feel.
I was wrong.
Today, there are days and weeks when I thankfully put it all aside for a breather, because I get… well, overwhelmed. And I find that if I let that happen, it bleeds quickly from the spiritual level into the physical level, and then I get panicked about a million things (that don’t really matter).
The other evening, I had gone into one of those panic modes for a little bit. I ran to the store to pick up a few simple things, and in the store, it was like I suddenly had a whole bunch of stuff mucked up, and I started getting anxious. Thoughts, worries, and doubts that were really pretty ridiculous started running through my head; it only took a few minutes before I could disconnect, observe those thoughts, and think, “Wow. Chill out. It’s all fine and good!” That quieted the mind down for the moment, but I still felt like I just had the anxiety at bay – not eliminated.
When I got home, in the dark (this was at about 9:30pm), a young bird – which turned out to be what’s called a nuthatch (though I’d never seen this interesting looking bird before) – was “running” around right on the driveway, acting really strangely. It ran under the car, and then sat there, looking like it was hurt in some way.
My husband got it out; there was a thought about putting it in the bushes or something…but I said no, leave it there. So, he and my kids went in the house.
However, I couldn’t get myself to leave the bird.
Initially, I also didn’t want to get too close, so I stood about 3 feet away from it. I was still a little in panic mode, though I didn’t realize it at the time. The reason I didn’t want to get too close? I was afraid, though I recognized not of the bird. Once I realized that consciously, I decided to put the thought aside and study it later; then I tuned in, and got that it was hurt… but there was something else. It wasn’t necessarily going to die, though I understood it could choose to. It would look like it was asleep… then it rolled on its side. At a certain point, I even thought it was dead.
Without even thinking about it, I kicked in to Theta Healing mode, and started communicating through Creator – to the animal’s Guide. Next, it felt right to bring in some Arcing Radial healing – and next thing I knew, the center of my back was radiating coolness and love, and I could feel several of the archetypes of the Divine Feminine circle around the bird – Mary, Mary Magdalene, Quan Yin, Isis, Woman of the Woods (it IS one of her creatures, after all!). Almost immediately after I started the Arcing Radial, the bird suddenly righted itself and looked at me, looked up into the tree, almost backwards, then looked at me again. It walked backwards a little bit, forwards, looked normal, twisted its head oddly, and then sat down and went to sleep, right there in the middle of the driveway.
Suddenly, I did something that was the MOST interesting thing I’ve experienced thus far: It was like EVERYTHING came together at once! Arcing Radial, Reiki, Shamballa, Theta, the Violet Flame – it was ALL ROLLED TOGETHER, like there was this POWERFUL ball of energy coming out of my hands and projecting over to the bird, who still had The Ladies with it. I was simply the vessel; I could feel that energy pouring through me and then over and into the bird, while at the same time, I was observing the Arcing Radial and… just everything. For an undefined period of time, I realized the feeling of being All One… because there was no separation. The Ascended Masters, the bird, the energy, the driveway, me…. we were all the same.
I have no idea how long I was out there in the dark with that bird – maybe 30 or 45 minutes. Finally, I heard Mary say to me, “You’ve done all you can do; we’ve done all we can do. The rest is up to this beautiful creature, but it has shared its message.”
And then I was fine. I went into the house knowing the bird would be fine either way.
As I learned, nature speaks to us all of the time, sharing messages we can choose to understand or ignore. So, after going back into the house – my earlier angst almost completely forgotten with the wonder of what had happened on my driveway – I looked up nuthatch as a totem message, and here’s the message that nuthatches share with us:
The grounding of spiritual energies along with faith and trust in the spiritual and physical.
The next morning, when my children, husband and I were leaving for the beginning of the work and school day, I looked up, down, and all around my driveway and even into the street, to see if that interesting and sweet bird had passed on during the night. However, there was no sign of the nuthatch. I mentally thanked it for sharing such an experience and message with me and went on with my day.
A little later, I was reflecting on that entire evening, and I realized that that my anxiety and initially not wanting to get too close to the bird was simply the fear of not being “good enough” to fix everything that can be fixed.
I realize I am. We all are.
THAT’S what we all need to remember… and practice.
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